So much to say ... so little time

I have got multiple posts to post, just can't fit it all in today.

Still need to post about our trip to the orphanage my mother grew up in.
Need to post about Friday night at the Waldensian Festival in Valdese. If you know what beach music is, shagging (the dance not the act :p)...my brother got the Tams there to play...was AWESOME!
Need to post about some other things too...

BUT, I have pulled a muscle in my shoulder (assuming that is what it is) and it hurts like crazy. Been doing ice and heat and it is easing up some.

I will post a little about today since it is fresh in my mind and there are no pictures to add to it.

I had Italy today, aww. But, I really wasn't sure how I would do with this stupid (insert your favorite explicative here)shoulder! Misti came over and helped a lot, she fixed lunch and while Lily and I did a scrapbook she cared for Italy. At one point Misti had them both in her arms bouncing lightly on a big exercise ball and put them right to sleep.

Shortly after Misti got here it was all I could do to hold back one of those ugly, nose running, face exploding, loud...did I mention ugly cries. When she had Lily I had thought I would have been pregnant around that time too. I pictured her and I taking them on walks, changing diapers and feeding them...laughing when one of our children burped or tooted. But here we sat on separate couches changing diapers, her with her beautiful children and me with another child that isn't mine. I think the pain of not having a child is gone sometimes but maybe it really isn't.

Ok, just had that ugly cry.

SIGH

I can close my eyes and see me with Lily and Italy and Simon...God I will make a great mom I promise, let me prove it to you please....ugly cry continued.

The shoulder is why I haven't been on really and it is crazy how much I think about fellow bloggers and things I want to say when I can't get on really. Typing one handed has taken about an hour to type this much.

We are going to my mother in laws tomorrow for the night - canasta night with the ladies from her church.

love to you all