Is the big day! I went for pre-op yesterday and had the other MRI. If anything is worse or changed, he will call today and discuss it...otherwise I will see him tomorrow at 11. I am nervous, but I have faith that this surgery will make all the difference.
Twice we have found a car that we wanted but had to talk about it and went back the next morning and it is gone! SOO frustrating. So we are still down a car and Scott will have to go on his own after my surgery to look. He found the VW on his own, so I am sure he can do this too.
I went to church with mom and dad on Sunday, Tommy and Little John and Korey were there too. I took a song to sing just in case, and they asked me to sing. I walk up to the front, and being as I can't feel anything in my right foot I didn't realize I hadn't cleared the alter and tripped...yep my greatest fear happened. I hope my skirt stayed down *UGH*. I scraped and bruised my leg, but I did sing. I probably sounded horrible, it hurt soooo bad. I sang I bowed on my knees and cried Holy. Mom loves that song and it was one I felt led to sing.
I have been battling the devil lately, he has made me feel overwhelmed, made me feel like God is putting more on me than I can handle. God is going to get me through this surgery and take away my pain, God will deliver us from this accident and make everything ok, He will make a way for children, He will direct us to a church, He is FAITHFUL!!
I withdrew from a lot of things, the devil got me to think I needed to handle things on my own. He does that! He really made me think that things would be easier if I just drew from my own strength not involve friends and family or God. My strength is nothing without those three resources. My friends can sympathize and empathize, they can be impartial and caring and give the best advice. My family are my rock, Scott and the rest unconditionally love me and will be there for me if and when I need them. And God is my everything, He is THE One! I just have to remember that my strength isn't me, it is within me. My family, friends and God are IN me and I have to draw from that not from self.
I really appreciate all the emails and calls during this time, it has meant a lot to know that I am thought of :)