A friend posted about this verse recently. Jealousy is something I can usually push down and 'pray' it away. Possessions, money, great jobs even good health is something I am rarely envious about. I would love to have some - ok all of those things but not to the point of being jealous.
Children...that on the other hand is the one time that green monster is bigger than me. I try to just ignore it but it seems that is when it gets stronger. I have to face it head on and pray and deal with it or it will grab hold and not let go. There are those that get pregnant around me that I am genuinely happy for. Especially those that have shared infertility with me. But there are times I hear about someone being pregnant and my heart pounds and my eyes swell with tears - and I do cry out to God WHY!? Why not me, why not Scott...why not Kari or Jill...or any on my blog roll or my circle of friends that are wanting a child.
I belong to a fertility message board, I used to be there daily and all over the boards. I found a group of friends there that have forever changed my life. For over a year that site was my source of knowledge on things infertility. It was a community of women trying anything and everything to have their dream. Lately though it has been tough going there - some are pregnant with number 3. Few...very few are still childless and the signatures with babies and toddlers decorate every page. It is hard to go there and read anymore, not really because of jealousy but it is more like a mommy board now than the wannabe a mommy board. Maybe I will feel different when it is my turn.
This verse really encourages me to do better in this area...who wants rotting bones!?!
I hope everyone has a GREAT Memorial day weekend. We are going to a pig pickin on Sunday with my family. I posted pics last year, it was so much fun...and boy am I in the need for some fun.